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Which Religions Have The Worst Music?

You be the judge...

Jun 22, 2023
Cross-posted by Church of Perpetual Reparations
"Guess who doesn’t go to church? Yep. Maybe check this out after breakfast. I’d hate for you to aspirate your oatmeal."
-
Chris Andrews

Religions do everything they can to reel in the fish. They build opulent palaces of worship, perform miracles, offer up eternal life and carry out mysterious rituals with catchy props. Both leaders and followers typically dress in flashy, often matching garb and the mediocre, repetitive scripture on which the whole religion is based is doctored up with cheap chords and sappy melodies. Add to this free parking, onsite childcare, a post-service potluck and socializing in the church hall and you’ve got the perfect snare for stealing wallets. And the really great thing? All of this entertainment and the exchange of money… TAX FREE!

Clearly, music at these houses of worship is near the bottom of their budget (if lack of quality and zero artistry are any indication).


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WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! Which of these religions has the very worst music, in your opinion? Which religion (fake or real) would have you returning to praise the lord? PLEASE give us your responses in the comments section. We would love to hear the WHY of your preferences. 🙏🏼


The KKK, a long-standing symbol of White Protestant Nationalism, offering up some stirring percussion riffs as they proudly march through town.


UNITED PENTECOSTAL

CHURCH OF GOD IN CHRIST

CATHOLICISM

APOSTOLIC PENTECOSTAL

KU KLUX KLAN

ISLAM

MORMONS

SCIENTOLOGY

CHURCH OF MOTOWN

WHITE LUTHERANS

INDIAN LUTHERANS

HINDU

CHURCH OF ENGLAND

CHURCH OF WHITE EVANGELICAL NARCISSISTS

WHITE BAPTIST

BLACK BAPTIST

JEWS FOR JESUS

EPISCOPALIAN

BUDDHIST

PRESBYTERIAN

JUDAISM

METHODIST

CHRISTIAN SCIENCE

UNITARIAN UNIVERSALISTS

WHITE SEVENTH DAY ADVENTIST

AMISH

NATIONAL BAPTISTS

CHURCH OF CHRISTIAN BREAK DANCING

ORTHODOX

CHURCH OF CHRIST

ANABAPTIST

SPIRITUAL BAPTISTS

ATHIESTS


Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us, only sky

Imagine all the people
Livin' for today

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

From “Imagine” by Yoko Ono and John Lennon


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Why did J.S. Bach have so many children (20)? Because his organ had no stops.


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